Posts tagged “choice theory”

A news story out of Colorado caught my eye recently, because it had to do with a school that is replacing traditional suspensions with meaningful conversations. They call it restorative justice. It sounds pretty choice theory to me.

At Hinkley High School in Aurora, Colo., students, parents and administration are meeting face-to-face to resolve student conflict with conversation. The number of physical altercations has taken a nosedive as this new type of disciplinary action, called “restorative justice,” replaces suspension. Hari Sreenivasan has the story.
February 23, 2014 3 Comments

Believing in Students: The Power to Make a Difference

I recently ran across a blog post by Dr. Richard Curwin, the architect of Discipline with Dignity, a program that is highly complimentary to choice theory. I actually ran across this short article in Edutopia, a wonderful online educational resource that focuses on what works in education. If you haven’t connected with Edutopia yet, you must do so quickly!

Here is the article – Believing in Students: The Power to Make a Difference – which first appeared in December of 2012.

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by Richard Curwin

After a morning Discipline With Dignity training, the high school principal and I walked to the cafeteria to eat lunch. He said, “I love your session, but it’s not practical.” I responded with my view that it was practical because it works — but it’s just not easy.

He pointed to a girl sitting alone at a table and said, “Do you think it would work with her?” She looked like she was a character from the Mad Max movies. She had just been released from federal prison. Her look was extreme (maybe not so much today) with spiked orange and purple hair, tattoos, all black makeup including black lipstick and black rouge, and severe body piercings. The principal looked at me and said, “So what would you do?” I asked back, “What about you? How do you handle her?” He said that he would draw a line and tell her she’d better not cross it. I responded, “What if she says, ‘I’ll kill you?’ Which one of you will be more afraid, her because she crossed the line you drew, or you because she threatened you with death?” The truth is that if she’s been to prison, nothing that can be done in a school would frighten her. Detention? Calling her mother?

So he again asked what I would do. I said, “Talk to her.” And he invited me to go over and try it right then. So I did. Dressed in my three-piece suit, I sat down at her table. She looked at me for a minute and said, “Who the f**k are you, a***ole?” I was a little stunned and didn’t have time to read a book or check my notes. So I relied on two strategies I had just taught the teachers in my morning session: meet the real needs of students and use challenge instead of threat.

I said, “I’m someone writing a book on teenage violence, and I think you know better about it than me. If you have the courage to tell the truth and answer one question (challenge), I’ll put your name in my book (need to be noticed).” She asked what the question was, so I replied, “Are there any teachers who you listen to, follow directions, show respect and learn from?” She said she had one like that, and I asked her what made that teacher different from the others.

Her answer is one that I will never forget and has been one of the constants in my work ever since. It’s a movie scene that replays over and over in my mind. Right before my eyes, her answer transformed her from a tough, hardened criminal to a frightened little girl.

Because she’s stupid. She thinks I can get a job someday, that I may even be able to go to college, or be a good mother because I know all the things not to do.

Then she started crying. The tears streaked down her black make-up and made her look like a zebra with black drops falling on her white top.

I ain’t going to college and I ain’t getting a job. I’ll never be a mother. I’m a dead girl. In prison when they write your name on the wall, you die, and my name is there. I know I’m going back. But that teacher believes in me, and man, it really, really matters.

Later I put her name, Roxanne, in my book and tried to find her to give her a copy, but nobody knew where she was or how to find her.

Sometime later, I traveled the country doing trainings. I asked administrators if I could meet with about ten of their most troubled students. I did this for grades K-12, in urban, rural and all economic areas. I did it on two Indian reservations. I asked two questions: “Who is your favorite teacher and why?” I expected most to say they had no teacher who was a favorite. But they all did. Among the top reasons was, “They believe in me.”

Five Ways to Reach Out
Believing in students is not simply telling them that you believe in them. These words matter only if they are true and if you demonstrate them by your actions. There is no way to fake it, because kids have built in crap detectors (a phrase taken from Neil Postman, and Charles Weingartner, in Teaching As a Subversive Activity), and they can tell if you don’t mean it. Here are some ways to express it.

1. Stop Using Rewards
Rewards are not needed if you believe in a student. The reward implies to them that they only way you can get them to do something is to pay them. That is the opposite of believing.

2. Encourage Effort More Than Achievement
Not every child can meet the unrealistic goals of a test-mad curriculum. Every child can try to do his or her best. Ironically, the harder students are encouraged to try, the better they do on our crazy high-stakes testing.

3. Give Second, Third and Fourth Chances
In many states, the law says, “Three strikes and you’re out.” In most schools, the most troubled kids get only one strike. The message is, “Be the way we want or we don’t want you.” School is for all children and mistakes are part of the learning process, not just for academics, but also for behavior. Rather than strike them out, teach them the skills they need to overcome their deficiencies.

4. Don’t Say “You Failed” – Say “You Haven’t Done It Yet”
Encourage hope by letting students know that, no matter what they do, they can still do better. Safety always comes first in a school environment, of course. Sometimes safety concerns override points 3 and 4, but not as often as we think.

5. Increase Opportunities to Learn
The children who need recess the most are the first ones to lose it. Being removed from field trips, the cafeteria, library and all other learning opportunities only makes students less able to handle them in the future. No one would say to a basketball player, “You missed too many foul shots. You can’t practice until you get better.” It is time to stop giving more opportunities to those who have already proven they are successful while denying opportunities to those who need them the most.

If we can start reaching kids like Roxanne sooner rather than later, who knows how many lives could change?

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Jim Roy follow-up — Choice theory is based on the idea that people are self-governed through an internal control system. People respond to the world about them — to their environment, to expectations, and even to external pressure or force — from this internal control system. Teachers have the special challenge of reaching students who are forced to be in school and who are often distressed because of awful life circumstances. These students, while they may outwardly put up protective walls, yearn to be affirmed. Only by genuinely honoring their internal control systems can we begin to melt the walls and get through to them.

Stay on the choice theory journey! Either you will find the answer there or you will be in the right neighborhood to find the answer.
February 20, 2014 7 Comments

Grief and Choice

Been quite a week for me – Went to bed sick on Sunday and am still basically in bed as I write this (on Thursday), although I think I am starting to crawl out of my hole. Antibiotics, chest x-ray, many of you are probably familiar with the drill. Hope your week has been a bit better.

I noticed something on Facebook a few days back and, with the author’s permission, I would like to share it with you. It is a short piece about grief and choice. Karen Nicola, the author, and her husband, Steve, have been good friends of mine for many years and I am glad to pass on her insight and wisdom to you. Her bio and contact information follow.

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MONDAY MOURNING:  What if grief was an option? Who would take it?  Can’t think of too many who would willingly sign up for that kind of uncertain full body slam.  While mourners cannot choose to wake up tomorrow and find themselves in a different emotional, mental, and physical continent, we can choose how we will travel the unfamiliar terrain in which we find ourselves.

So let’s talk a little about the freedom of choice and how that influences the outcome of our crushed souls.  We can choose to do things that contribute to wellness.  Even with limited appetite, we can choose healthy foods to eat; we can take additional vitamins and minerals to enhance our body’s health.  Any outdoor exercise improves our circulation and thus increases our capacity to deal with the surges of emotional tides.  We can choose what we listen to and allow music to be a calming influence in our daily routine.  We can choose to write about our process.  Keeping a special book that captures our pain is a safe and useful tool of releasing the whirlpool of fear, guilt, blame, shame, anger, pain, sorrow, and despair.  Have you imagined the potential of choosing healing?  Sometimes the bereaved believe that clinging to our pain is evidence of our unending devotion to the one we dearly love.  Choosing to heal can be one of the most difficult choices we make.  Healing has no predetermined process; it comes differently for each one. Choosing healing actually demonstrates respect for the deceased in that we are allowing their absence to create space for us to become whole again and even deeper, richer individuals than before.

This kind of healing comes from a Higher Power than ourselves. Choosing to trust God with the process of healing just might be our most important choice of all. How would it work if we made just made one conscious choice each day to move towards health and healing?  We might find that one day leads to the next and the uncertain terrain of living apart from the one we love is moving us further from darkness and brokenness and nearer to an open, mended, and giving heart.

Karen Nicola writes and speaks encouragement that comes from her own experience with God and His Word as she worked through her grief following her three-year-old son’s death from leukemia.  Now, more than twenty-five years later, Karen continues to be passionate about the hope of God’s healing for our brokenness.  She is also aware that many struggle to know how to comfort those who mourn, so she is eager to encourage the encouragers too.  Through her book, Comfort for the Day, readers encounter two of God’s most effective healing tools; His word and journaling opportunities. Karen maintains a web site that runs two blogging conversations; one for the bereaved and the other for those comforting them. Visit www.comfortfortheday.com for more information. When she is not leading seminars, she thrives in the high school classroom, teaching international students at Rio Lindo Adventist Academy.  But her favorite activities involve anything to do with her family.

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February 13, 2014 4 Comments

Where In the World?

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Where in the world did the phrase – the better plan – come from? And why was it chosen as the name for this blog?

Good questions, both. So lets get to the first one. Here is the passage “the better plan” comes from –

Those who train their pupils to feel that the power lies in themselves to become men and women of honor and usefulness, will be the most permanently successful. Their work may not appear to the best advantage to careless observers, and their labor may not be valued so highly as that of the instructor who holds absolute control, but the after-life of the pupils will show the results of the better plan of education.   Fundamentals of Christian Education, p. 57

As to why I chose “the better plan” as the name for the blog, I think it has to do with the Three Remarkables that can be found in the passage

Remarkable #1
The phrase was actually first written in 1872, and its author stuck with the theme of this passage through the turn of the century until her death in 1915. The passage is remarkable because of what she said – that schools should be focusing on the power that lies within students – and when she said it – at the start of the Industrial Revolution and its massive influence on the way schools operated. This internal power had everything to do with choice, freedom, and responsibility. The passage was emphasizing choice and freedom at a time when schools were becoming like factories, with an emphasis on external control.

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Remarkable #2
The passage presents the reality that teachers who introduce their students to the power that lies within themselves – in other words, internal control – rather than focusing on controlling them through external control, will be misunderstood and under-appreciated. Careless observers will not get it. Traditionalists will cling to external control as the answer. It is amazing that over 100 years after it was first written the passage is still timely today.

Remarkable #3
The passage was written by a religious author, who we might assume would be part of the traditionalist, external control, “make em do what we want em to do” scheme of things. However the author wasn’t like that at all. She saw the need for and value of students coming into an understanding of their choice power. And she saw the importance of this being an inside-out process, rather than outside-in. In her opinion this process was so important that she equated “the better plan” with connecting students to a healthier after-life, including the best after-life of all – that being the forever life of life eternal.

These are some of the reasons I like the phrase “the better plan” so much. It’s all about choice and freedom.

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Ellen White, the author of the better plan phrase, and the author who wrote about the special power that students have within themselves, consistently emphasized that humankind is powerless without Jesus. Through Him, she wrote time and time again, all things are possible, without Him nothing is possible. He created human beings to have the power of choice and to be free. Nothing indicates our having been created in Jesus’ image as much as this incredible freedom to act and to do and to be. And it was this freedom that He died on the Cross to preserve. Satan likes nothing better than to deface a person’s power to choose; he likes nothing better than to trap and addict and imprison. But Jesus came to earth to do a couple of incredible things –

1 – He came to destroy the works of the devil.  1 John 3:8

2 – He came to set the captives free.  Luke 4:18

Now that’s an awesome Better Plan!

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Just a reminder to keep the calendar dates on the left of the page in mind, especially the Soul Shaper dates in June.
February 10, 2014 2 Comments

Quitting Smoking and the Nuclear Strategy

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The Happiness Project, a blog I follow, recently posted a letter from a gentleman who described his strategy to break the habit of smoking. Citing a number of habit breaking strategies in the post, the specific strategy described in the letter was categorized as “the nuclear strategy.”

I am curious what you think about this habit-breaking approach. Do you think this would be a good way to break a particularly difficult habit?

And to my fellow choice theorists, how does this strategy complement or contradict the principles of choice theory?

Here’s the letter –

I picked up smoking when I studied abroad in Vietnam. The father of my host family didn’t speak English, but he smoked, so he encouraged me to join him. Open to new experiences, I went from zero to a pack a day in one week.

That pack-a-day habit stuck with me for three years while I tried everything to quit smoking — set deadlines, cursed my lack of willpower, thought that switching to a tobacco pipe was somehow better. It was terrible.

Of the hundred ways I tried to quit, here’s what worked: I set a date in advance that held meaning for me (the one year anniversary of graduating college), I wrote out a long list of both the things I hated about smoking, and the things I loved about smoking (so I knew the tradeoffs), and then — what I consider the innovative part — I hand-wrote fifteen letters to friends and family members saying “If, after May 20, 2001, I ever smoke another cigarette, I will pay you $200.” I sent these letter particularly to friends who themselves were smokers.

When the date came, I gave away my remaining cigarettes, lighters and accessories. I scheduled new after-work activities to break up my routines for a couple of weeks. And I noticed a funny thing: my smoking friends, who had previously tried to lure me back to smoking in my earlier quitting attempts, were now constantly handing me cigarettes — then reminding me of the money I was going to pay them if I accepted the cigarette. “This cigarette will cost you $200,” my friends would say. The letters had turned my enablers into enforcers. Needless to say, when that one cigarette would cost me $3000, it was easier to refuse it.

And that was it. I still love smoking, and really wish I could smoke. But I went from a pack a day to zero, cold turkey on May 20, 2001 and haven’t smoked again.

The blog went on to explain that a nuclear option is when there’s some major drawback to breaking a habit. For some people, it pointed out, this really helps.

So what do you think? Is the nuclear option simply a gimmick? And if so, are gimmicks ever ok within the choice theory framework?

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February 7, 2014 9 Comments

The Teacher in Me

Our theme for the banquet was The 70s, with quite a few in attendance, including the band, dressing accordingly. Lots of fun.

Our theme for the banquet was The 70s, with quite a few in attendance, including the band, dressing accordingly. Rob Fenderson, principal at Redwood Adventist Academy, and Albert Miller, Assoc. Supt. for No. Cal. Conf., headlined the band.

Our Education Days’ banquet and job interviews took place this past Monday and Tuesday. This annual event is designed to connect our graduating teacher candidates with potential employers. A banquet on Monday evening leads to meet and greet mini-interviews on Tuesday morning. During the introduction part of the banquet, candidates head to the microphone and share about themselves as future teachers, often commenting on what motivated them to become a teacher and the pictures they have in their heads about the kind of teacher they want to be. For those of us who saw these candidates come to PUC as Freshmen, and have watched them conquer challenges and grow into adulthood, it is special to listen to them, on the verge of being hired and beginning their careers, describe their vision for education.

We enter our teaching careers with promise, exactly like these young teaching candidates, resolved to care about kids and make a difference in their lives, however it isn’t unusual for the pressures of the classroom and the rush of life to sweep our intentions aside. For instance, I received an email last week, written by one of my former students after he read the According to the Quality School blog

I just read your post about quality schools.  Ya know, I got into education wanting a classroom much like the one described in that post.  I specifically wanted to teach in public schools because I believed a teacher who had Christ in his heart and a desire to truly help children grow and not just claim a paycheck once a month and get summers off was needed more in the public school systems than in one of our Seventh-day Adventist schools.  But 9 years later I find myself being just like one of those teachers I swore I would never be.  I often feel defeated.  I feel like I am in a battle between myself and my principal, between myself and the state department, and between myself and a system that only cares about test scores and could care less about young people.  It has been a losing battle.  I feel defeated.  I have swum against the stream for so long and I am tired and it shows.  I used to create lesson plans that were fun, lessons that focused on getting young minds to explore, to ask questions, to learn from mistakes.  Now I find myself scouring the Internet for a worksheet just so I can “cover” a skill.  The other day I caught myself refusing to “waste time” answering a question from a student because it wasn’t a topic that would be tested on the state test.  A few years ago I would have stopped everything and had the kids start reading, searching the Internet, conducting experiments, and drawing conclusions to answer that question.  I would have tossed aside the lessons I spent hours preparing to let the kids answer that question.  Instead, I actually found myself saying, “Ask me at recess, we don’t have time for that right now.”  The child never asked me the question at recess.  And I forgot all about it.  What happened to me?  Ugh!!!  Not sure why I am dumping all this on you right now. Just read that post and guess I needed to get that off my chest and maybe receive some sage advice.  Sometimes I wish I was still at PUC.  The pressures of college were nothing compared to the pressures of full time teaching in a system that only cares about looking good on paper.   I hope all is well with you and your family.  God bless.

I share this letter because I think it may capture the thinking and feeling of quite a few veteran teachers. The constant crush of classroom responsibilities and details can crowd out our real reasons for wanting to teach. Choice theory beliefs seem to be especially fragile in the midst of this “crush.” We leave a choice theory workshop or training, or maybe finish reading a book about choice theory, and are fully intent on putting these ideas into practice. And we do for a time. But then the crush hits from multiple sides, maybe home is complicated, maybe our spouse is acting weird, maybe church is stressful, and then there is always the crush of school.  This is one of the main reasons I wanted to start The Better Plan blog. I want it to be a small part of your day that keeps the choice theory ideas alive and that reminds you that there are others of us that are on this journey, too.

I’m not sure if I responded exactly right, but what follows is part of what I wrote back to my former student – “It sounds like that teacher you feel you used to be is still in you, still wanting to show up in your classroom. I believe the circumstances you mentioned are real, especially the pressure to achieve on standardized tests. There are some things you cannot change. The question is, what are some things you can change? What are some things that would help you to like going to work more? What are some things that you can do that would help students realize they are cared for and that they can succeed? Is your school or district doing much with the Common Core yet? I see the Common Core as an important step away from the NCLB emphasis. The Common Core needs teachers to teach creatively and to empower students to learn.”

I don’t think what I said was that special, yet when he sent me a reply that included the following I was reminded how easy it can be to encourage one another.

As I read your post I am astounded by the fact that I don’t practice what I preach.  “You are the only one that you can control” has been a mantra of mine for several years now.  Your advice aligns perfectly with that mantra.  That is definitely what I will begin doing ASAP, taking a closer look at what I can do instead of focusing on what is out of my control.

His final thought is good advice for all of us. What are areas in our life in which we do have influence and control, and how can we make improvements in those areas? And to my fellow choice theorists, what are some of your “go to” thinking or acting habits when the crush begins to close in on you?

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Have a blessed weekend! We are finally getting rain and fog in northern California, which we desperately need, so it should be cozy soup-eating, book reading (or blog reading), by-the-fire weather.

Have Choose a good day!
February 1, 2014 2 Comments

My Dear Maggot

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The Screwtape Letters (C.S. Lewis’s 1942 classic) pulled back the curtains that shield us from Second Heaven and revealed conversations that occurred between an uncle and his nephew. Both of them were demons and as such both of them were in the business of tempting human beings toward wrong turns and wrong lives. Uncle Screwtape coached and counseled his nephew, Wormwood, as the younger tempter struggled to influence the life of the human to which he was assigned. It should come as no surprise that one day Wormwood himself would become the coach and pass on his knowledge to a younger relative, in this case his grandson, Maggot, a fledging tempter trying to learn the ropes.

My dear Maggot,

How touched I am that our communication is deepening and that you are so willing to lay open your thoughts and your struggles regarding your tempting strategies and the apparent lack of success that you are thus far experiencing. Honesty is not a trait that we demons display with any consistency, so I commend you for your candor. This openness will assist me as I counsel you toward more effective approaches. Keep in mind, too, that you are planting seeds of discouragement and resentment that will grow in due time. Be patient with your patient. Remember that you are in the business of making others discouraged, not in getting discouraged yourself.

In your recent letters you have shared so many details – your patient’s tendency to seek the Enemy, to want to be close to him, to want to get involved with helping others – which are all serious problems that need to be dealt with. However, it seems to me that in rushing from a tree here to a tree there, you are missing the bigger forest. Frustration over individual details are keeping you from seeing the bigger picture. Not that these details are unimportant. It’s just that seeing the bigger picture first will serve as a foundation from which to launch a more effective attack.

Since you have asked, I will begin to share with you some of the bigger, more essential elements that, I am confident, will re-focus and re-charge your efforts. Although I hate to quote the Enemy’s manual, it is instructive here to refer to a letter that traitor Paul (how he went to the other side is still beyond me) wrote to people in Corinth (a lovely city with so many wonderful problems). Anyway, he wrote that –

For the Kingdom of God is not just a lot of talk; it is living by God’s power. Which do you choose?    1 Cor. 4:20, 21

First, and I think you already know this, it is absolutely vital that you cloud and confuse the choice-power of your patient. This theme – the ability of humans to make effective choices – is rampant throughout the Enemy’s manual, yet so few humans really pick up on this. The minute they stray from this awareness we have them. For if they aren’t in the process of choosing, the alternative is that they are victims of circumstances, tossed to and fro by their tumultuous feelings. I smile just thinking about it. You and I both know that these disgusting little humans have been created in the image of the Enemy, with amazing internal guidance systems, but this must be hidden from them. At all costs.

You may at first question what I am about to write, but write it I must – religion is not our enemy. In fact, humans can be messed up by a lot of things, but nothing can mess them up as much as religion can. Paul (the turncoat) realized this when he wrote about the Enemy’s domain being about a lot of talk versus being about real power. Let his words be a lesson to you. Shower your patient with religion, let him marinate in its rules and habits and schedules. Just be sure to keep him in the realm of talking, and studying, and behaving. There are so many benefits from this focus! Where do I begin?

+ Being disconnected from the real power of the Enemy, they will try to surmise truth and reality from their own miserable, limited, little perspectives. The Enemy tried to warn them about this during his pathetic sermon on the mountainside (it is important to study what the Enemy says and does), when he pointed out that it is possible for them to think they are right(eous), when in fact they are right where we want them.1

+ One of the supreme benefits from the “lot of talk about religion focus” is its effect on their young. I savor this result as much as any of our victories. You would think they would have figured this out by now, but no, they continue to emphasize habits and lifestyles and right living. Let them talk, encourage your patient to talk. The fact is, and we must say this quietly, their young wouldn’t walk away from real power (who would?); their young walk away from talk. I’m almost laughing as I write this. Here they are desperate for power and they refuse to simply plug into the Enemy’s vast resources. It’s too easy, really.

+ Lastly (at least for this letter), without being connected to the power, religious humans lose sight of, and even move in the opposite direction of – I hate even to write the word – love. Based on what the Enemy has done for the wretched things you would think that christian would be a wonderful word to them, a cherished concept. Yet look at what the word christian evokes in people now, especially in that place they refer to as the United States. (united? lol as they would say) When humans hear that word now they often think about pictures of self-righteousness, political posturing, and meanness. This is a victory that must be placed near the pinnacle of our successes! One of the Enemy’s writers, that awful little Ellen White, explained this process perfectly, yet fortunately she may as well have been writing to a wall.

When men indulge this accusing spirit, they are not satisfied with pointing out what they suppose to be a defect in their brother. If milder means fail of making him do what they think ought to be done, they will resort to compulsion. Just as far as lies in their power they will force men to comply with their ideas of what is right. This is what the Jews did in the days of Christ and what the church has done whenever she has lost the grace of Christ. Finding herself destitute of the power of love, she has reached out for the strong arm of the state to enforce her dogmas and execute her decrees. Here is the secret of all religious laws that have ever been enacted, and the secret of all persecution from the days of Abel to our own time.2

I was worried, even scared, when I first saw what she had written, thinking that the earthlians would “get it” and head back onto the Enemy’s path, but I was soon reminded my fears were unfounded. They are more into being right, and making others be their view of right, than they are in being connected and (forgive me) loving. Keep your patient focused on the value of rightness. Prompt him to be willing to sacrifice others for the good of the right. And by all means, present to him the importance of religion and the value of knowing, dissecting, and being right.

I apologize for my droning, yet I remember with such affection the counsel I received from my Uncle Screwtape when I, like you now, needed it most. You are my cherished grandson and I yearn for your success. I look forward to more of our discussions.

Pridefully,

Grandpa Wormwood

P.S. – I know that you wanted me to specifically help you with a concept your patient is studying called choice theory. You are correct to be concerned about this. Hopefully, you can see how my letter begins to address these concerns. The concepts of choice theory are part of the Enemy’s way and I am glad you discerned this on your own. More on this later.

1. Matthew 6:22, 23
2. White, E. (1896). Thoughts from the Mount of Blessing, (p. 126-127). Takoma Park, MD: Review & Herald Publishing Association.

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January 30, 2014 8 Comments

According to The Quality School

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Another recent study1 confirms what many previous studies have already indicated, that delaying high school start times increases the amount of sleep that adolescents get, improves their emotional states, improves their alertness and performance at school, and even reduces the teen car crash rate2. It would seem with these kinds of results that schools would quickly move to change the start of the school day until later in the morning. Even small delays in start times can lead to statistically significant improvements. Such scheduling changes aren’t taking place, though, at least to any noticeable degree, and students continue to battle fatigue, including drinking lots of coffee, deal with depression in growing numbers, and struggle to do well in academic content.

I recently gave my Secondary Methods students a choice of reading one of Glasser’s books that focused on educational practice. Several of them chose his book, The Quality School (1990),which outlines the elements that contribute to a school being a student-friendly place in which they can become the best versions of themselves. I don’t recall Glasser specifically talking about school start times in The Quality School, however I am confident that, given the data, he would support later school day start times if were still around. (He liked to sleep in, too.)

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When I first read The Quality School as a young principal in the early 90s, I can remember thinking that I wanted to be a part of such a school. Later, during my doctoral research I analyzed the book more carefully and developed a list of elements that Glasser felt Quality Schools would prioritize. I include that list below.

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According to The Quality School

Relationships are highly valued – especially between students.

Staff and students like coming to school.

No student will be able to say, “No one cares about me.”

Cooperative learning is a common instructional format.

Focus is on quality; low quality work is not accepted.

There is no busywork.

There are no bad grades; B’s are required to receive credit.

To receive an A, students would have to produce something beyond competence.

Grades can be improved.

No nonsense is taught or tested; no objective tests, all tests are open book.

There is no compulsory homework.

There is no elitism.

Rules are kept to a minimum.

There is no punishment.

Parents are not asked to fix problems at school.

When students get into trouble and need to be suspended, there is no set suspension time. The suspension lasts as long as needed for the student to address the mistake.

Students may be asked to leave class.

The keys are 1) eliminating coercion, and 2) incorporating self-evaluation.

A loving, flexible environment is more valued than a rigid, threatening one.

Focus is on changing the system, rather than on changing students.

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School start times aren’t mentioned on the list, but I would like to think that a school wanting to become a quality school would be open to such a change. Of the elements that are listed above, which of them appeal to you as more important and more needed? Which of them are you more skeptical about? As always, I encourage you to share your thoughts with the rest of us.

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1. An article in the Journal of Developmental & Behavioral Pediatrics, by Boergers, et al., 2013, described how later school start times improve sleep and daytime functioning in adolescents.

2. A study described in the Journal of Clinical Sleep Medicine, by Danner and Phillips, 2008, indicated the following: Average hours of nightly sleep increased and catch-up sleep on weekends decreased. Average crash rates for teen drivers in the study county in the 2 years after the change in school start time dropped 16.5%, compared with the 2 years prior to the change, whereas teen crash rates for the rest of the state increased 7.8% over the same time period.

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Tell a colleague about http://thebetterplan.org
January 25, 2014 8 Comments

7 Cardinal Rules for Life

Cardinal

I’ve appreciated the stuff that often is posted by the website at www.lifehack.org, like the 7 Cardinal Rules for Life that follow here. (What cardinals have to do with rules for life, I’m not sure.) Along with the Rules I share a choice theory response to each of them. (Of note: The Soul Shaper workshop dates for this summer have been set and are listed at the end of the blog.)

7 Cardinal Rules for Life

Rule #1 – Make peace with your past, so it doesn’t spoil your present. Your past does not define your future – your actions and beliefs do.

It would be hard to come up with a more choice theory statement than this one. I think the phrase “make peace with your past” is important. We’re not trying to run from the past, hide from it, cover it, or deny it. We come to desire our joy in the present and realize our need to see the past for whatever it is and, like it says, make peace with it. I like the statement’s emphasis on thinking and acting, too, which supports the idea of every behavior being a total behavior. It really is pretty amazing that we were created to have direct control over what we think and what we do.

Rule #2 – What others think of you is none of your business. It’s how much you value yourself and how important you think you are.

Choice theory emphasizes that the only person we can control is ourselves, but I like how Rule #2 is worded. It is such a debilitating condition to be worried about what others think of you. It is so freeing to let this particular worry go.

Rule #3 – Time heals almost everything, give time, time. Pain will be less hurting. Scars make us who we are; they explain our life and why we are the way we are. They challenge us and force us to be stronger.

I hesitate to write about #3. The topic of wounds, especially emotional and spiritual wounds, is a sacred space to me and deserves a special respect. That said, it is apparent to me that some people allow healing to take place and continue to want to make the best of life, while others seem to want to nurture the hurt and hold onto it.

Rule #4 – No one is the reason for your own happiness, except you yourself. Waste no time and effort searching for peace and contentment and joy in the world outside.

The world of choice theory is a place of responsibility. A key, though, is that responsibility is something that dawns on a person, rather than it being a message that one person enforces on another. Responsibility functions best when it is like the sun coming up in a person’s life, providing light to see the world in a new light.

Rule #5 – Don’t compare your life with others. You have no idea what their journey is all about. If we all threw our problems in a pile and saw everyone else’s, we would grab ours back as fast as we could.

Comparing our life to that of others traps us in thinking that our happiness depends on our circumstances being different. Or worse, that our happiness depends on our circumstances being better than someone else’s. Choice theory keeps bringing us back to our happiness coming from within, not from without.

Rule #6 – Stop thinking too much. It’s alright not to know the answers. Sometimes there is no answer, not going to be any answer, never has been an answer. That’s the answer! Just accept it, move on, NEXT!

I’ll have to think about this one.

Rule #7 – Smile, you don’t own all the problems in the world. A smile can brighten the darkest day and make life more beautiful. It is a potential curve to turn a life around and set everything straight.

A smile is a choice. Yes, sometimes we laugh as a reflex, but sometimes we just need to choose to smile. And in making that choice, in a small way, the day does get just a little bit better.

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Which of the Life Hack Rules do you relate to? Did any of them get you thinking about choice theory ideas? Let me know.

Reminder – Middle School and High School teachers can share the Rules with students and have them respond to them and evaluate them. They can be a great springboard for talking about choice and responsibility. Tie a writing assignment to them. Discuss them in a life skills class.

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Important Dates

The Soul Shaper workshop dates for this coming summer at PUC have been set.

Soul Shapers 1 –  June 16-19

Soul Shapers 2 –  June 23-26

If you have questions about the workshops get in touch with me at jroy@puc.edu.
January 21, 2014 5 Comments

Know Yourself

You probably don’t know the guy in the picture. Until recently, I didn’t know him either. His name is Charles Handy and it turns out that in the world of business and management he is rather famous. An Irish philosopher and author, Handy has been rated on the Thinkers 50 list, a list that ranks the most influential living management thinkers. In 2001, he was second on the list, behind only Peter Drucker. In 2005, he was tenth. Sounds like a tough list.

I digress. Anyway, in a book he wrote entitled The Hungry Spirit (his eleventh book, written in 1997) he outlined the ingredients for a successful school system in the modern world (But aren’t we in the post-modern era? Again, I digress.) He listed four ingredients for success, although it was the first one that struck me for some reason. Handy’s first ingredient, at the top of the list is –   ( d r u m r  o   l    l )

* The discovery of oneself is more important than the discovery of the world.

What a great choice theory statement! Those seeking to learn about choice theory and put it’s principles to use in their lives really are on a journey to discovering themselves. As you come to recognize that the pictures in your quality world have been purposefully placed there by you, it becomes clear that knowing yourself is of the utmost importance. Blaming others or the world for your problems makes less and less sense as you realize the significance of your power to think and to act.

Handy must have recognized the importance of this challenge, too, and recommended that teachers assist students in discovering their own identities and strengths. Discovering their identity is one of the greatest gifts a student could ever receive. Coming into a knowledge of who they are, what they value, what makes them happy, what fulfills them, and the behaviors that bring them closer to the important people in their lives will put students on the road to success.

In case you are curious about the other three ingredients on Handy’s list. Here they are –

* Everyone is good at something.

* Life is a marathon, not a horse race. (Don’t focus on testing to the exclusion of cooperation, team working, curiosity, and confidence.)

* The best learning comes after experience. (So much education nowadays comes before experience.)

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Teaching students about the basic needs and the quality world is a sure way to help them discover who they are. Glasser once said that there is nothing in choice theory that a six year old can’t understand. I agree with him.

With smaller children, up to age 7, focus on simply teaching them about the basic needs. Give them simple definitions. As you read stories to the children, ask them about the basic needs of the characters in the story. Have them think out loud about which needs seem to be the strongest. As different situations come up in the classroom, take a moment and review the basic need that helped or hindered a good outcome. The point is to dialogue openly with the students about the needs. Don’t focus on what a particular student’s needs are. Just talk about them in general.

As students get older they become more able to consider their own personality makeup and to consider their own basic need strengths. This is an excellent time to introduce the quality world to students, as the people and things and activities we collect in our quality world give us clues into what our personal basic needs really are.

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An excellent resource for primary grade teachers is My Quality World Workbook by Carleen Glasser. You can purchase the workbook at www.wglasserbooks.com or you can call 310-313-5800.

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Choice Theory Study Group is this coming Sabbath afternoon, January 25, 2:00 pm in the PUC Education Department building, Room 212.